Details

It is amazing how much life is about the details. it is a 7 letter word that makes experiences all that much better. When it comes to weddings, it is all about the details. Thankfully the process has gotten a bit less stressful now that a lot of the big details have been nailed down and I am able to focus on the little details and not feel as rushed. I am also indulging in the occasional wedding magazine. It is fun to look at all of the pomp and finery that people put into their big day...and yet I wonder how work they put into their marriage. Amidst all of the organizing, calling, booking, mailing, sighing, and stressing I have to continue to remind myself that all of this is for one day. Am putting this much effort into a marriage that will last far beyond our first dance and how my hair looks? I want to pay attention to the details of Nick and our life together. This is my challenge for the 80 something days.

In other news, my church threw a party for me, that was very nice. I am so blessed to have them around to support me. I am reveling in God's blessings to me. He is so good!

Wedding Stuff

In an effort to document my wedding experience, let me tell you right now that wedding planning is a lot to handle. When I first became engaged, everyone began telling me about how much fun it was to plan a wedding and how much I will love it.

They lied.

I started out my planning with stars in my eyes and a content smile. Then all of the details (which are still being decided) were having trouble cementing. I have come to the conclusion that wedding planning is so intense so it makes you want to stay married because you don't want to go through planning another one.

I may be exaggerating a bit.

All that to say, yes it is stressful. But, when I remember why all of this hoopla is occurring it makes it all worth it. If the colors aren't perfect, the reception locale is a little off - who cares? All that matters is that I get to be married to an amazing man and am able to celebrate that love with my family and friends.

Life is good and God is good. :)

Off to do some more planning.

Life Changes

Apparently this is the blog of large events in my life. It has covered my surgery and growth from that, and now is going to focus on weddings. Yey! I got engaged. This is an event that I thought would never have occurred 6 months ago. But, God has blessed me beyond measure with a fabulous guy. I guess patience pays off.

It is crazy how fast life changes. We went from talking about what we wanted to do on a Friday and having a relaxing glass of hot chocolate to discussing where we wanted to have a wedding and frantically finding details to places that we pray are not booked.

How life changes.

Not only is our relationship moved from one level to another, but I find myself beginning to see the world through "us" glasses when previously all I had to use were my single focused ones. It is neat for me to see how God is changing my perspective to leave the world of "me" and join the ever learning world of "we." It is a heavy undertaking, but I would not miss this ride for the world.

In the past few days I have been scrambling to begin filling in the details of the big day. It is fun, but stressful for me because details are a struggle. There are so many aspects of one day to deal with. It is crazy. Thankfully, I have people in my life who revel in details.

Today will be spent hammering out more details, taking a nap, and hoping Nick can come home. He is on storm duty in Hillsdale and I miss him.

Hope you all are staying warm!

Yipes!

I have realized just how long it was since I last posted. I need to be better at that. My surgery has been months away and I am in the throws of a school year that is all to quickly fleeting.

As for the healing post surgery, I am doing pretty well. I refuse to see my scar as a "blemish" or something that needs to be hidden by a turtleneck (granted turtlenecks are of the devil, but thats another topic). I am seeing my scar as God's faithfulness to me, His omnipotent timing, and a promise that my job on earth is not finished. Remembering that makes all the stares okay.

My surgery has also taught me that I tend to rely on myself a lot more then I should. It is ever humbling to need help buttoning pants, or calling to my dad when I had turned myself into an awkward position and could not move out of it. (thanks dad!) I am glad that those days of physically needing someone to do little tasks are over, but am trying to keep close in mind the lessons of that "storm."

The Two Week Mark

Today I am a day over two weeks of surgery. It has been amazing to see how much each day makes a difference in recovery. I am feeling more antsy and want to go out of the house to experience life. Sitting here reading and watching about life is reaching its limits. But, I think that my "go go" lifestyle needs this little break and I am trying to enjoy it to the fullest. I am reminded of Paul when he said "I have learned the secret of being content in every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength". (Philippians 4:12-13) I am trying to apply this verse to my season of rest.

So, small gains in the recovery department:

1. I can now make small sneezes. On Monday all I could do was make a terrible moaning sound whenever I tried to sneeze.

2. I can cough. My lung capacity has risen over the past few days and I can now breathe a deep breath and bring up any junk that shouldn't be there.

3. I can sleep sitting on my bed. On Monday I could not, and was sleeping on the couch sitting up.

4. My bump is slowly going down. YES!

5. I can get out of bed

6. I can button my own pants. - gotta love the little stuff!

My dad has been great this week. With my mom gone on vacation, he has taken my undies off the laundry line (a true labor of love), buttoned my pants (after making sure nothing was "showing"), and has been there to turn me over in bed when I could not move after having turned myself into a weird position. We will see where the next week lies.

I'm Home

After 5 days of chilling in the hospital, I am back. I was very blessed with visitors and laughter and which made it a better experience. They changed the surgery. They replaced a heart valve and also "un-roofed" my pulmonary valve by trimming a part of a flap of my heart to allow better blood to flow. I am feeling decent and waiting around for my sternum to heal. :) Some pictures:

Getting ready for surgery. Steve and Jami Newton were there to support my mom and me. Others showed up in prayers and calls.
My mother took this right after surgery was over. Thanks mom.

This outline made by blue marker was made when a HUGE shot in my neck was being pulled out and nicked something...and freaked out the nurse. She drew a outline of how huge the hematoma(blood spreading under the skin) was so they could check to see if it grew any larger. It didn't.
With some of the visitors who came to see me. Yay for Springport schools support!
With my mom 3 days after surgery. She took great care of me.
My sis and Anne came to visit and brought me some laughter and pony tails
The only way my arm will ever look like a drug user.
At home and relaxing. Annnnd maybe still on drugs because I am finding EVERYTHING hilarious...but I have to make it small laughs for now because of the sternum pain makes me sound like Marge Simpson laughing. ha ha

One another shorter rant...does anyone think it is tad sad that they feel the need to make a bachelor/bachelorette for heavier people called "More to Love"? What happened to good people meeting other good people regardless of their size?

Hospital Stuff

So, here is some info from my pre-op. For all of Friday I will be on a breathing tube and unable to talk to anyone. However, they expect me to be awake and aware by Saturday morning. Once I am gone from the breathing machine, I will be moved from ICU and sent to the floor. There I can have visitors at anytime. :) Don't be freaked out if I look weird. I will be having wires and tubes coming out of me (if I can't watch Transformers, I can at least look like one ;) ) and look a bit puffy.

Good news, my surgeon is world renown. :) What a blessing that I live 45 minutes away from there.

I am in the Mott's Children Hospital, pediatric cardiology.

I will post more when I get a chance. See you on the other side of surgery.